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Artist's Statement
“He's
a goofy kid. Everyone sees the big, hard, tough guy, silent, really. He's just
a big goofball.” - Bobby Frasor
There
is just no way to hide it. Sometimes we have to own up to elements of our
personality that we try to suppress out of fear. We want to create something
different for ourselves, an identity that fits what is acceptable and enjoyed
by the public. It can appear artificial or mechanical. Within the confines of
my identity however, there is always one comforting reminder I can come back to
when I need a pick me up. It boils down to one little sentence: I am a closeted
goofball! It may not be apparent to many people, as I have been told I can come
off rather serious and strong willed in many aspects. And yet this is that
small part of my personality I have tried to preserve and craft over the years
as a means to handle situations. I am sure many of us can understand this
duality and how what others perceive is not always what is actually inside.
Thinking
about this, two pieces of media came to my mind. The first one was Charlie
Chaplin’s Modern Times, his classic satire
on the rise of industry. Comedy always seems to be an outlet for people to set
their lighter and goofier sides loose. Watching the opening acts of the film
helped me make a connection I had not otherwise. The arc of this intro shows a
seemingly stressed and overworked man becoming a loose cannon when he has had
more than he can take. As I saw it, it’s not so much that Chaplin’s character
is going insane as it is revealing the bottled up wackiness to handle stress.
While he certainly reacts crazier than I would, the way it is expressed spoke
to me personally. And with the turmoil and drama in his own life, what better
way for Chaplin to show off his lighter side than through a variation of his
goofy alter ego The Tramp?
The
other piece was Jamiroquai’s Virtual
Insanity; his hit single about the way technology drives the world crazier.
Other than noticing crazy was a consistent theme with this and Modern Times, I also remember how amazed
I was not only the song itself but its music video. The lyrics juxtaposed with
the imagery of dancing to a constantly moving room seemed almost the inverse of
the previous example. Rather than letting the world pry open his wackiness,
Jamiroquai integrates it as a part of himself to counter the problem. It’s not
so much hiding as it is putting something in such plain light it is just a part
of you. Putting this alongside Modern
Times felt fitting because of it.
The
actual re-editing and assembly of the movie was an entirely different beast.
Along with the long time processing the movie footage, the direction of what I
wanted to do was not always clear. The vagueness and imminent due date loomed
over my mind and caused stress. I figured maybe I could parallel the influence
of technology and how technology was a part of my personality to the point of
being crazy. Feedback from roommates and friends online countered this idea. It
never really struck them that way. They commented on how wacky it seemed, which
was so contrary to their perception of me. That is when the idea solidified
itself. I decided to let the video progress more naturally in that wackiness. I even toyed around with a few aesthetic choices, like the motion blur of Chaplin going around the gears back and forth. I needed to let that part of me edit the film and I felt
that part was expressed.
It is hard to quantify this part of my
identity to others, yet it is a part I feel others can relate to. We can all be
a father, a religious man, a fireman or whatever title we assert. Yet
inherently, there is that inner personality we conceal that shows something
about our true selves. We can call it a “goofball” or whatever, but it is that
side only certain people truly see and only comes when it is invited for better or worse.
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